Rediscovering the 'Me' in 'Mumeeeeeee'

'I have always thought that there is no more fruitful source of family discontent than a housewife’s badly-cooked dinners and untidy ways'. (Mrs Beeton's Book of Household Management, 1861)

January 11, 2011

I have never.....

On The Graham Norton Show last weekend (yes, my weekends are THAT exciting), there was some discussion about a show which one of his guests, Marcus Brigstocke, is hosting where celebs confess to things they have never done.

This caught my interest, especially as I have a BIG birthday looming this year, and I thought it was a good time to think of some things I have never done, and aim to rectify some, or all, of them during 2011. Now, of course it would be silly of me to list things like 'I have never landed on the moon' or 'I have never had legs like Elle McPherson' because, let's face it, those things are NEVER going to happen to me.

So, being very realistic, here is my 'I have never' list . I wonder how many I can convert to an 'I have' list before the year is out.

1. I have never watched 'It's A Wonderful Life' in full, despite owning a copy of it. I have also never seen 'Fatal Attraction', any of 'The Godfather' trilogy, 'Dr Zhivago', 'Schindler's List', or either of the 'Sex and the City' movies.
2. I have never read (among others) 'Little Women', 'The Catcher in the Rye', 'Huckleberry Finn', 'The Great Gatsby' or 'Frankenstein',
3. I have never been to New York, Budapest, Glasgow, Stockholm, Sligo or Wolverhampton (surely there's a chance I'll make it to one of these places in the next 12 months!).
4. I have never eaten a 'Fillet-o-Fish', a McFlurry, a king sized Mars Bar or a Hershey's Bar.
5. I have never seen an episode of 'Grey's Anatomy' or any of the CSI's.
6. I have never worn false eyelashes.
7. I have never been up for sunrise at a summer or winter solstice.
8. I have never done a parachute jump or a skydive (not sure I want to do either actually).
9. I have never had a book published (this is my year, this is my year, this is my year.....)
10. I have never made soda bread or pizza dough (hangs head in domestic shame).
11. I have never worn Chanel No. 5.
12. I have never been arrested (and am perfectly happy to leave it that way).
13. I have never drunk a vodka martini - shaken, or stirred.
14. I have never been in a limo.

So, that's the list so far, although I already get the feeling that I'll want to keep adding to it in a 'My Name is Earl' kinda way.

So, what have you never done and is 2011 the year to do it?



  1. Good grief, that's quite a list!

    You may find that once you start you will flow from one item to the next, crossing them off with minimal effort.

    But I have to state for the record that number 12 is not something to aspire to, keep that one uncrossed with my blessing ;-)!

  2. Great post!

    I have never read any of the Harry Potter books or watched any of the films;
    I have never eaten a KFC meal;
    I have never been to Edinburgh, Cardiff, Bristol, Belfast or Newcastle;
    I also have never seen an episode of Grey's Anatomy, or Father Ted, One Foot in the Grave or Home and Away;
    I have never had my ears pierced;
    I have never driven an automatic car.

    I'm not in a rush to do any of them this year, apart from perhaps visiting some of the cities I mentioned.

  3. I've never been arrested either. Hope I'm not missing out on a crucial life experience ;-)

    Great post!

  4. Even I've made pizza dough! ;-)

    Great post, brilliant list and I hope a couple of them come off this year for you - I'm thinking number 9 or number 3 rather than number 12, obv...

  5. You know, when go to a new town, do you start by calling all the people you don't know? Of course not! The list is endless. Focus on what you've accomplished, baby. But if you want, I'll go ride in a limo in NYC drinking vodka martinis with you?!

  6. I jumped out of a plane - yes, with a parachute, before you ask - but that was during my Uni days when I was 'young and wild at heart'

    Of course now I am MUCH more mature...
    *skips off into the distance with skirt tucked into knickers*

    LCM x

  7. I have never had a decent night's sleep.... ok, I porbbaly had back in 2003 but it sure as hell feels like it right now. Gray's Anatomy - don;t know what you're missing! Actually the book one is good (this is my year too..... or so I keep telling myself!).... although I mean the books to read. I have never read Catcher in the Rye, Anna Karina, Ulysis (can't even spell it!) - so this is the year I'm going to read that long backlist of books I should have read by now..... you've got me thinking - off to puruse the bookshelves.

  8. not sure if my comment was posted so excuse me if this is a repeat - laptop trouble!
    I've never : had good legs
    Finished Ulysees despite my place on the MA at Newcastle being solely based on my finishing it! (Arden crib notes were a great help!!)

    That's about it - I've lived, girl! Even been arrested (well, almost..)

    Oh yes - I've never thrown a laptop out of the window in anger, but am soon going to!

  9. Swap Budapest for Moscow and come for a visit... That's one ticked off your list, at least>

  10. I have never seriously tried to write a book.

  11. I think I can actually help with your list, just buy yourself a boxset of series 1: grey's anatomy, ( I defy anyone not to be hooked after the first episode!) pop the It's a wonderful Life DVD into the laptop next time you're doing the ironing, a pair of ear-phones with a very long cord is a must! you will cry when you hear the bell ring,just to warn you! Get yourself a copy of little Women and Catcher in the Rhye, read at your leisure and keep writing and writing, you'll get there..
    Everything else on your list is way over rated, except maybe the city destinations, but they're not going anywhere, you have loads of time, pick one and go, I recommend citizen M in glasgow for a unique hotel experience!
    Good luck

  12. As someone who has already reached that BIG birthday, I would recommend watching Dr Zhivago with home made pizza and a king size mars bar wearing only Chanel No5 and false eye lashes. A typical Friday night in for me...

  13. What a fun post--I was starting to compose something similar in my head before I commented but my list became embarrassingly long... And I am past a BIG birthday. Oh well. ;)

  14. Don't bother with Sex and the City 2 but do the rest. I aim to save the best 'til last and get be arrested when I am of pensionable age. x

  15. It's a no go on Stockholm, Wolverhampton and Sligo.
    No on numbers 8,9 and 12 as well.
    I am afraid of heights so count anything like that out, but maybe river rafting this year.

    I have a Stylish blogger Award for you with rules on my blog if you fancy it. I am rubbish at links so here goes-

  16. I'd never had a gin martini until last Thursday. Fixed that one though.

  17. After reading your blog, I tuned in to Graham Norton on Friday night last...(see you've just gained Mr Norton another viewer!)and had such laughs! Anyway, he did the "I have never" thing again & a woman in the audience said she had never kissed Keanu Reeves. The same Mr Reeves was actually in the studio & I was quite surprised he didn't accept the challenge. Maybe he was a bit overwhelmed by the all the frivolity...
    Great post & as others have said, you've loads of time to do (most of) them.


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