Rediscovering the 'Me' in 'Mumeeeeeee'

'I have always thought that there is no more fruitful source of family discontent than a housewife’s badly-cooked dinners and untidy ways'. (Mrs Beeton's Book of Household Management, 1861)

June 2, 2010

Been there, done that

Oh the joy of being an ‘experienced’ parent. We’re like the equivalent of a Bridget Jones ‘smug-married’, safe and comfortable in the knowledge that we got past those first few years in one piece. We calmly reassure our friends that it really won’t do their baby any harm if they give them back the toy they just dropped on the floor, that they will, at some stage, get their child to sleep through the night, and that they will, one day, find the energy to blow dry their hair nicely.

My friend had a baby girl yesterday – hello to little Lauren – and I am so thrilled for her, but so glad it isn’t me. I think I would rather be subjected to another summer of Big Brother than face the emotional rollercoaster of a tiny baby again (apologies to any expectant or new mums out there). It’s not that I don’t adore teeny, weeny babies – I do and I got all soppy and emotional recently when the Small Boy moved out of his cot into a proper bed. A simple case of swaps to some; a symbolic end to our baby days to me. But I soon got over that and moved on and have now mentally and emotionally switched off the part of my brain that can cope with a new baby.

So, I am glad that I’ve ‘been there, done that’ on the baby years, but before I get too smug, you’ll be pleased to hear that there are still plenty of struggles which lie ahead of me.

The next one to be faced is toilet training. Oh yes – been there, done that alright and although my first child was actually quite easy to train (although I could have selective memory on this point), as I armed myself yesterday with a potty, toilet booster seats, big boys pants, old towels, Dettol spray, Kandoo wipes, reward charts and Percy Pigs (all essential toilet training equipment if I remember rightly), I felt a familiar sense of dread.

When you’ve been there, done that and are going there again, you suddenly don’t feel quite so smug anymore. Wish me luck!

By the way, if you have just had a new baby, Sandy at 'Baby Baby' has just written a great post full of advice. Well worth a read.

p.s. the ‘blog-iday’ was a great idea and it’s good to be back


  1. Me too! Me too! This rang so true for me. Toilet trained my first years and years ago (he's 10) and now I'm about to do it with two year old. Am not relishing the prospect. Even though, like you, it went okay the first time, I think maybe I have wiped (no pun intended)it out.

    Good luck! Man the barricades!!

  2. Oh yes, this made me laugh. One reason why (despite the fact many of my friends currently seem to be doing it) I will definitely NOT be having a third child... just starting to see light at the end of a long, dark tunnel.

    Good luck with the potty training!

  3. Am about to start toilet training here too.. Well I say that but after very easy first (she is now 6) who sat on the potty and enjoyed it all, I am NOT looking forward to sorting out my second daughter who will not sit on potty unless fully clothed, will scream if you put her near potty or toilet and does not like to run around bare bummed. She is sooo ready as she will come up to you the moment she has done a wee and go "Happy Nappy" mummy so need to get the damn things gone now

    Please remind me what the hell I'm doing wrong!!


  4. To be a mother of teenagers! Though guess what, sometimes they still miss the bowl, boys just don't get any better even if they were started on the right potty.
    Getting our puppy in the summer so it will be whinning nights and peeing on the newspapers. It all comes back to us at sometime.
    Good luck x

  5. My almost 3 year old was 'dry' at 2 but for reasons unknown (and trust me, I've tried every single option) in the last 3 months, she's regressed to wetting at least 8 pairs of pants a day. This morning we have woken up with little blisters- Chickenpox. Could that explain the wet pants for so many weeks??
    I have just got the girls a kitten each (kind Mummy) and they are litter trained already. 6 weeks old and not a single wee on the kitchen floor.. I adore them for it!
    Hope you have quick success!

  6. As somebody who was reduced to paying her child (I recycled the money, he never noticed..or spent it) to use the loo instead of nappies it is just as well that I feel like you when somebody has a baby.

    Love babies, love them to bits and stalk them in supermarkets to peer and coo.

    but do not wish to have another one in my home, under my care, 24\7 ever again.

    i don't think I could manage if I actually knew how long and how hard it was going to be. The only thing that kept me going the last time was ignorance, I just assumed any day now things would get easier and sleep and I would be reunited.

    Took six years before I got a full night of kip in reality.

  7. Welcome back and thanks for the link.
    I'm sad to leave the baby days behind and filled with absolute horror by potty training. Good luck, do let us know how you get on - top tips welcomed! x

  8. I have to admit I am dreading potty training BG. Welcome back hun x

  9. Well said! My youngest was the worst to potty train -- the oldest two seemed just so easy in comparison but then I could have selective memory too!

    P.S. Welcome back! x

  10. I'm doing toilet training at the moment... (Well, not me - my daughter, obviously.) It's too tiring.

  11. Oh you young mothers! Yes its demanding and tiring - brace yourselves there is a lot lot more to come and you will look back with a smile and think of these "potty days" with affection and realize how simple and uncomplicated life was then. Try not to pull your hair out with frustration, they will get it eventually!!! Be patient with your little ones and enjoy them (minor trials and tribulations as well.Good luck HCM - nice to have you back.

  12. I feel exactly the same about new babies. Trouble is I'm nearly 6 months pregnant. And I'm in the early stages of potty training. Double whammy.

  13. Hooray. Good to see you back. No I don't envy anyone with a new baby, or facing the potty training days although it will all be over before you know it. x


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